Snake Oil:
Grow, play, evolve, experience, this world, while recognizing our true essence stretches far beyond it.
Jim Ventura’s Snake Oil columns express his studies of the insight and guidance of many different kinds of cultural and philosophical perspectives. His essays teach his readers to trust the inner prompts from their Higher Selves. The tangible world is a product of our beliefs. If indeed we create our reality, then we can learn how to create a happier, more empowered reality. Everyone has the ability to shift their perceptions to include the abundant metaphysical influences that are part of every experience. Snake Oil’s focus is on expanding consciousness, while still keeping our feet planted firmly on the ground in this world. Jim V. reminds us that we can emotionally and spiritually grow to become progressively more enlightened by opening to the infinite, abundant wisdom, knowledge, and humor in ourselves and in the world around us.
Snake Oil monthly newsletter
My second book Snake Oil Volume One is now available in print. This will be followed by Snake Oil Volume Two in 2020. You can read my books in advance for free by signing up to receive my monthly email-blog column. Mention your Birthday when requesting being added to monthly newsletter to also get yearly Birthday special offer.
The newsletter comes approximately once a month (usually at the beginning of each month). Your email address is never shared with anyone. Transformative insight, discounts on sessions, columns and other great information will come to you each month. Email me at Venturasag@yahoo.com to sign up.
A few past columns:
Snake Oil 103/A Little Bird Told Me
I watched a marathon of the Mary Tyler Moore show a few weeks ago. A part of my childhood happily revisited and truly one of the best television comedy shows ever to air. It was made up of a cast of incredibly funny, lovable, talented actors, and was extremely well written. Mary’s closest friend Rhoda loses twenty pounds in one significant episode. Even though she looks incredible and part of her is quite proud, she is uncomfortable with all the compliments she is receiving. She even gets angry with some of her friends complimenting her as well. She wins first place in a small beauty contest at the department store she works at, and at first lies about winning by claiming she only got third place. Rhoda is a truly likable, attractive, funny, and smart character, but she is also plagued by self deprecation fears. Self deprecation is one of the seven human fears that centers around a fear of inadequacy and measuring up. Many people struggle with this chief negative feature in a major or minor way. Its positive pole or expression is humility. Its negative expression is abasement. It is rooted in a deep seated fear of accomplishment and often a belief (and dread) that if one is successful, people will expect more of the same and end up disappointed.
In Druid tradition the totem animal of Wren - a small bird shows the more positive side of humility and reminds us that small is beautiful. Having a healthy sense of humility and not always making everything about us can be a wonderful attribute. Gentleness, subtlety, and cunning can be valuable if tempered with good humor and a positive intent. Wren reminds us also that when it builds its nest it may borrow things from others. We can look at a birds nest and laugh when we see pieces of newspaper, bubble gum wrappers, and all kinds of odd stuff that went into building its home. We all borrow things from others, funny jokes told to us by others, wise quotes, and even taking advantage of the talents and skills of others. We accept compliments for a great haircut or nice wardrobe choice even though we didn’t cut our own hair or make the actual clothes. We understandably take credit for positive feedback about our home or property even if a landscaper or decorator actually did the job! In some respects this is really okay. We still were smart enough to hire and use the talents of the ones who did the work for us.
Whatever your political affiliations are, it would be hard to have not noticed the profound sight of Bernie Sanders speaking during his campaign back in 2016 in front of a large crowd when a small bird landed of the podium in front of him just inches away. He smiles at the beauty of the little bird landing there. The more intuitive of us sensed something in this simple event happening. A seventy something year old modest, Jewish man was able to mobilize huge crowds of mostly really young people with a positive message about a different path for the United States to consider. He was like the little bird that understood that small can be beautiful. The contrast was the eventual election of someone who in many ways is the exact opposite. Few of us would see Trump as someone who is small and humble!
The negative side of the Wren as totem is similar to the negative pole of the self deprecation fear: abasement. Sometimes our humility and gentleness can make us invisible. When we fear we are inadequate or simply not good enough, we may purposely hide in photographs or at events only to then be irritated later when people don’t see us! Think of the shy girl or guy who hides behind others in pictures, or consistently defers to others. “Oh, were you at the company party last week? “Yes, and we actually talked there for about fifteen minutes!” Experiences similar to this can prod a self deprecating individual to become cheeky or malicious when we are not recognized or are ignored. Responding by talking behind the backs of more confident, outspoken people, or becoming sarcastic as a retaliation from being ignored is a common response to being hurt by others this way. Cunning and healthy wit can be ugly too if cunning becomes malign rather than benign. The character of Chandler Bing on the show Friends and Rhoda from Mary Tyler Moore sometimes showed this behavior while still maintaining lovability.
“Of all the birds revered by the Druids, the wren was considered the most sacred. In Ireland it was called the Drui-en, or Druid Bird; in Welsh the word Dryw signifies both a Druid and a wren.
Why is it that the Druid is pictured as an apparently nondescript little bird and not as an obviously powerful bird like the eagle? The following story from the western highlands of Scotland tells us. In a great assembly of the the birds of the air, it was decided that the sovereignty of the feathered tribe should be given to the bird who could fly the highest. The favorite was naturally the eagle, who immediately began his flight toward the sun-fully confident in his ability to win the title of King of the Birds. When he found himself soaring high above all his competitors, he proclaimed in a mighty voice his monarchy over all creatures that had wings. But suddenly, from out of his wings propped the wren, who had hidden himself under the eagle’s feathers. he flew a few inches higher and chirped loudly, ‘Birds, look up and behold your king!” * Druid Animal Oracle Philip and Stephane Carr-Gomm
While the story is funny and shows how truly smart a little bird can be, it also shows an upstart or someone who naively believes he can fool others into thinking he is the more powerful bird. We may get understandably upset if we are rejected in love matters, or passed by for a promotion, or not chosen for any number of other reasons in life. This can be especially uncomfortable if we are plagued by self-deprecation. We may even get angry at our mistreatment and respond by attempting to malign others or strike back. Another more passive response is to get angry at ourselves: “I don’t blame them for not choosing me, I am not nearly as good as others.” While there may be some justification or even truth to either perspective, neither approach will ever move us forward. Both responses come from an issue that stems from low self-esteem.
Whether we have a lot or only a little self-deprecation (some people pretty much have none, but that’s another whole article) we can choose to recognize that it is our belief in our unworthiness and lack of self-worth that is the actual problem. This may be the reason that we draw rejection to ourselves. Our thoughts and beliefs about ourselves are perceived by others and they will respond accordingly. Beliefs when recognized can be changed though. The self deprecation fear is not something we are born with. It is acquired during childhood and can can also be released. We can also choose to recognize the profound totem wisdom of Wren, that small is beautiful. We don’t have to be grandiose or larger than life to be valuable. Think of someone who does the lighting work at a broadway show. Consider the tremendous value of nurses who contribute to healing as much as a doctor but in different ways. Mother Teresa was a powerful example of the power of the best aspects of Wren. Not everyone needs to be an Eagle! Being small and unobtrusive has some real benefits. It can enable us to maneuver through life skillfully and enter small places and worlds that others could never reach. Balancing a healthy dose of humility while maintaining healthy self esteem isn’t always an easy thing to do, but it can be done.
Jim Ventura 4-2017
Snake Oil 63
Finishing another chapter
It was perfect cosmic timing. I had planned to drive to Las Vegas for a much needed vacation a few Sundays ago. Right before I left for my Vegas trip I stopped at the restaurant I had worked at for the last two years for the very last time. The owner and his wife were packing up everything of value to take back with them to Kentucky. He gave me my last paycheck in cash, and said goodbye. It was bittersweet. While working there had been filled with its share of drama and ups and downs, it was mostly a positive experience for me. I liked the owner and his wife and considered them to be my friends. They had put more than two years of their hopes and dreams and a considerable amount of hard work into the Pasta Palace. The restaurant had gotten mostly excellent reviews. The majority of our customers raved about the food and often literally licked their bowls clean. There were problems that contributed to the restaurants demise. Summers were typically not very prosperous seasons in the restaurant business and 2010 saw one of its worst ever. In fact, it seemed by December we were still struggling to stay afloat. The expected busy season never really came. The owner was slowly going broke. Phoenix’s downtown scene was hit hard economically. Aside from people being cautious about spending money in general, Arizona’s current governors hardball stance on immigration dramatically reduced the amount of visitors that normally came to visit the city. Hotel stays, conventions and the money that came with them were way down because people and some companies were boycotting the city. In addition, ridiculous city taxes and blunders by the city itself also contributed to difficulties experienced downtown by many of the bars and restaurants. Some mistakes were made internally by the management and owner, and this all contributed to one of Phoenix’s best restaurants permanently closing its doors.
I arrived at 7:30 am and the owner had already been there for two hours. He and his wife were pragmatically moving everything of value into a moving truck and planned to head back home permanently. Very few words came to mind that morning. I wanted to say something inspirational to him and was usually good at doing things like that, in this case, however, nothing came to mind. I was feeling very emotional and that was not helping “the right words” to come through. I was one of the few remaining original staff. I had been part of this restaurant family three to five days and nights a week for a little over two years. I was not only losing some very helpful extra income, but also saying goodbye to some good friends and a home I had been very comfortably part of for some time. I have never been good with emotional scenes, so I simply hugged the owner, said goodbye, and got in my car to drive my four and a half hour trip to Las Vegas.
The moment I got safely into my car was when the tears began to flow. It was sad to witness a friend’s dream coming to an end. I was depressed about the end of working in a really fun place and saying goodbye to a good part time job. The restaurant was really struggling with making a profit and I knew that it would probably close. My card readings suggested it, and I could practically see that there was no way the owner could continue to operate in such conditions. He had been “robbing Peter to pay Paul,” and I’m sure he was exhausted. Not only was I saying goodbye to some good friends, but I was also experiencing another ending. It was probable that I would no longer work in this field again. There were many endings happening that morning and it was more than a little overwhelming. I cried more than a few times on my drive to Vegas.
I have been in and out of the restaurant business for almost thirty years. I started as a busboy in the Bethpage state park golf course in New York at the age of sixteen. Since that time, I have waited tables and tended bar in more than a dozen different places. One of the things I have always liked about the business is something most people actually don’t like. It is a fluctuating stream. Some shifts you make $8.00 and then the next one could be $300.00. The gambler in me always enjoyed the surprise. Working odd hours and not doing nine-to-five has helped me to stay away from the normal work stream. This had given me more time to pursue my creative interests. Best of all, the majority of people in the restaurant business are also creative, open-minded, eccentric, and interesting to say the least. This business seems to pull in a larger share of mature and old souls, my kind of people. Some of the friends I have met in the many different restaurants have become lifetime friends.
As I made my way north I had a flood of different memories. I remembered the close friends I worked with at two different restaurant chains when I still lived on Long Island. I met so many lovable characters and made frequent trips to the Huntington diner after our shifts. I was in my early twenties at that time, smoked a good amount of pot and did my share of drinking with some of my fellow restaurant friends. I made good money, had some real fun and occasionally pushed the limits with my “bad boy stuff.” I made a whole bunch of new friends when I moved to Arizona and began to work in a cheesy prime rib hotel restaurant. Nearly every night we hung out after our shifts and drank Bailey’s and coffee by the huge fire pit. Some of those friends became roommates and supported me during some really tough times. I remembered the French restaurant I worked at for seven years. Each night after our shift we had a family style dinner. I learned about great wine and cognacs and really got to develop a taste for gourmet food. I had been part of that family for a long time. My emotions were on overload as I got closer to Nevada. So many funny memories, interesting people, supportive friends, and positive experiences that spanned three decades. I have always been blessed with an abundance of friends and the places I worked had provided the majority of them. It was incredible when I thought about how many different friends and family work environments I had been a part of over the years. A few of the people remain close to me and I still fondly remember many of the ones I have lost contact with as well. I could see how each person I knew in all of the different places I had worked, had influenced who I now am, and I am sure I have done the same for many of them.
When I first realized that the Pasta Palace was going to close I began to panic a little. I would be losing nearly a third of my current income. Even though I had options for other part-time restaurant jobs, I felt no desire to pursue them now. It was time to go in a different direction. There were books to finish and new ones to start. It was time to put myself out into the world in a bigger way and expand the amount of clients I could help. I knew exactly what I needed to do and had the courage to do all the things that were necessary to replace the income I would be losing. Better still, I could do it in far less hours than the restaurant took to make the same amount of money. Financially I would be fine. The universe would take care of me. My fear about the future passed fairly quickly. Still, my emotional body needed to mourn the loss for a few days. My two years there were beneficial and special and I needed to celebrate my sadness. All things change, and this chapter had come to an end. There was a new chapter in my life beginning and I wasn’t exactly sure how it was going to go, but I knew it would be equally challenging and fun.
In Lakota Indian teachings, Tate is their word for the spirit of wind. Wind reminds us that sometimes we have to make minor or major changes in our lives. When we don’t listen to the gentle nudges of wind, it may have to get very loud and scream at us. Thankfully if we listen, Wind can direct us to flow to new places in gentle ways. Tornados and Hurricanes are examples of Wind at its most challenging. Nature can be very loud and even destructive at times, it can shake up larger areas and groups of people. When we listen to Tate we can trust the prompts and know that we will be carried to new and fertile ground. I opened my car window and felt the cold morning breeze. It was perfect for me to be mourning my loss as I drove to Las Vegas. This would be followed by checking in to my comped hotel room and experience some fun and luxury for a few days. I would have plenty of good distractions to keep me from thinking about my loss and worrying about tomorrow. That is what I love about Las Vegas, I get to be mindless. The fun would help to pull me away from the sadness. Deeper still, as sad as I was to say goodbye to this part of my life, some part of me wanted it to end. I was tired of all of the extra hours I had been putting in, and I think the owner was as well. I had co-created this ending and I have evolved enough to see that there was no victimization in any of it. I had chosen to more forward and manifest abundance in some new areas. I would joyfully say goodbye and at the same time, exist between that place where sadness at an ending and excitement for the future co-existed. I would enjoy some good rest and play for a few days and also look forward to the excitement of starting the “next chapter.”
Jim Ventura 1-2011
http://playingwithuranus.blogspot.com
Grow, play, evolve, experience, this world, while recognizing our true essence stretches far beyond it.
Jim Ventura’s Snake Oil columns express his studies of the insight and guidance of many different kinds of cultural and philosophical perspectives. His essays teach his readers to trust the inner prompts from their Higher Selves. The tangible world is a product of our beliefs. If indeed we create our reality, then we can learn how to create a happier, more empowered reality. Everyone has the ability to shift their perceptions to include the abundant metaphysical influences that are part of every experience. Snake Oil’s focus is on expanding consciousness, while still keeping our feet planted firmly on the ground in this world. Jim V. reminds us that we can emotionally and spiritually grow to become progressively more enlightened by opening to the infinite, abundant wisdom, knowledge, and humor in ourselves and in the world around us.
Snake Oil monthly newsletter
My second book Snake Oil Volume One is now available in print. This will be followed by Snake Oil Volume Two in 2020. You can read my books in advance for free by signing up to receive my monthly email-blog column. Mention your Birthday when requesting being added to monthly newsletter to also get yearly Birthday special offer.
The newsletter comes approximately once a month (usually at the beginning of each month). Your email address is never shared with anyone. Transformative insight, discounts on sessions, columns and other great information will come to you each month. Email me at Venturasag@yahoo.com to sign up.
A few past columns:
Snake Oil 103/A Little Bird Told Me
I watched a marathon of the Mary Tyler Moore show a few weeks ago. A part of my childhood happily revisited and truly one of the best television comedy shows ever to air. It was made up of a cast of incredibly funny, lovable, talented actors, and was extremely well written. Mary’s closest friend Rhoda loses twenty pounds in one significant episode. Even though she looks incredible and part of her is quite proud, she is uncomfortable with all the compliments she is receiving. She even gets angry with some of her friends complimenting her as well. She wins first place in a small beauty contest at the department store she works at, and at first lies about winning by claiming she only got third place. Rhoda is a truly likable, attractive, funny, and smart character, but she is also plagued by self deprecation fears. Self deprecation is one of the seven human fears that centers around a fear of inadequacy and measuring up. Many people struggle with this chief negative feature in a major or minor way. Its positive pole or expression is humility. Its negative expression is abasement. It is rooted in a deep seated fear of accomplishment and often a belief (and dread) that if one is successful, people will expect more of the same and end up disappointed.
In Druid tradition the totem animal of Wren - a small bird shows the more positive side of humility and reminds us that small is beautiful. Having a healthy sense of humility and not always making everything about us can be a wonderful attribute. Gentleness, subtlety, and cunning can be valuable if tempered with good humor and a positive intent. Wren reminds us also that when it builds its nest it may borrow things from others. We can look at a birds nest and laugh when we see pieces of newspaper, bubble gum wrappers, and all kinds of odd stuff that went into building its home. We all borrow things from others, funny jokes told to us by others, wise quotes, and even taking advantage of the talents and skills of others. We accept compliments for a great haircut or nice wardrobe choice even though we didn’t cut our own hair or make the actual clothes. We understandably take credit for positive feedback about our home or property even if a landscaper or decorator actually did the job! In some respects this is really okay. We still were smart enough to hire and use the talents of the ones who did the work for us.
Whatever your political affiliations are, it would be hard to have not noticed the profound sight of Bernie Sanders speaking during his campaign back in 2016 in front of a large crowd when a small bird landed of the podium in front of him just inches away. He smiles at the beauty of the little bird landing there. The more intuitive of us sensed something in this simple event happening. A seventy something year old modest, Jewish man was able to mobilize huge crowds of mostly really young people with a positive message about a different path for the United States to consider. He was like the little bird that understood that small can be beautiful. The contrast was the eventual election of someone who in many ways is the exact opposite. Few of us would see Trump as someone who is small and humble!
The negative side of the Wren as totem is similar to the negative pole of the self deprecation fear: abasement. Sometimes our humility and gentleness can make us invisible. When we fear we are inadequate or simply not good enough, we may purposely hide in photographs or at events only to then be irritated later when people don’t see us! Think of the shy girl or guy who hides behind others in pictures, or consistently defers to others. “Oh, were you at the company party last week? “Yes, and we actually talked there for about fifteen minutes!” Experiences similar to this can prod a self deprecating individual to become cheeky or malicious when we are not recognized or are ignored. Responding by talking behind the backs of more confident, outspoken people, or becoming sarcastic as a retaliation from being ignored is a common response to being hurt by others this way. Cunning and healthy wit can be ugly too if cunning becomes malign rather than benign. The character of Chandler Bing on the show Friends and Rhoda from Mary Tyler Moore sometimes showed this behavior while still maintaining lovability.
“Of all the birds revered by the Druids, the wren was considered the most sacred. In Ireland it was called the Drui-en, or Druid Bird; in Welsh the word Dryw signifies both a Druid and a wren.
Why is it that the Druid is pictured as an apparently nondescript little bird and not as an obviously powerful bird like the eagle? The following story from the western highlands of Scotland tells us. In a great assembly of the the birds of the air, it was decided that the sovereignty of the feathered tribe should be given to the bird who could fly the highest. The favorite was naturally the eagle, who immediately began his flight toward the sun-fully confident in his ability to win the title of King of the Birds. When he found himself soaring high above all his competitors, he proclaimed in a mighty voice his monarchy over all creatures that had wings. But suddenly, from out of his wings propped the wren, who had hidden himself under the eagle’s feathers. he flew a few inches higher and chirped loudly, ‘Birds, look up and behold your king!” * Druid Animal Oracle Philip and Stephane Carr-Gomm
While the story is funny and shows how truly smart a little bird can be, it also shows an upstart or someone who naively believes he can fool others into thinking he is the more powerful bird. We may get understandably upset if we are rejected in love matters, or passed by for a promotion, or not chosen for any number of other reasons in life. This can be especially uncomfortable if we are plagued by self-deprecation. We may even get angry at our mistreatment and respond by attempting to malign others or strike back. Another more passive response is to get angry at ourselves: “I don’t blame them for not choosing me, I am not nearly as good as others.” While there may be some justification or even truth to either perspective, neither approach will ever move us forward. Both responses come from an issue that stems from low self-esteem.
Whether we have a lot or only a little self-deprecation (some people pretty much have none, but that’s another whole article) we can choose to recognize that it is our belief in our unworthiness and lack of self-worth that is the actual problem. This may be the reason that we draw rejection to ourselves. Our thoughts and beliefs about ourselves are perceived by others and they will respond accordingly. Beliefs when recognized can be changed though. The self deprecation fear is not something we are born with. It is acquired during childhood and can can also be released. We can also choose to recognize the profound totem wisdom of Wren, that small is beautiful. We don’t have to be grandiose or larger than life to be valuable. Think of someone who does the lighting work at a broadway show. Consider the tremendous value of nurses who contribute to healing as much as a doctor but in different ways. Mother Teresa was a powerful example of the power of the best aspects of Wren. Not everyone needs to be an Eagle! Being small and unobtrusive has some real benefits. It can enable us to maneuver through life skillfully and enter small places and worlds that others could never reach. Balancing a healthy dose of humility while maintaining healthy self esteem isn’t always an easy thing to do, but it can be done.
Jim Ventura 4-2017
Snake Oil 63
Finishing another chapter
It was perfect cosmic timing. I had planned to drive to Las Vegas for a much needed vacation a few Sundays ago. Right before I left for my Vegas trip I stopped at the restaurant I had worked at for the last two years for the very last time. The owner and his wife were packing up everything of value to take back with them to Kentucky. He gave me my last paycheck in cash, and said goodbye. It was bittersweet. While working there had been filled with its share of drama and ups and downs, it was mostly a positive experience for me. I liked the owner and his wife and considered them to be my friends. They had put more than two years of their hopes and dreams and a considerable amount of hard work into the Pasta Palace. The restaurant had gotten mostly excellent reviews. The majority of our customers raved about the food and often literally licked their bowls clean. There were problems that contributed to the restaurants demise. Summers were typically not very prosperous seasons in the restaurant business and 2010 saw one of its worst ever. In fact, it seemed by December we were still struggling to stay afloat. The expected busy season never really came. The owner was slowly going broke. Phoenix’s downtown scene was hit hard economically. Aside from people being cautious about spending money in general, Arizona’s current governors hardball stance on immigration dramatically reduced the amount of visitors that normally came to visit the city. Hotel stays, conventions and the money that came with them were way down because people and some companies were boycotting the city. In addition, ridiculous city taxes and blunders by the city itself also contributed to difficulties experienced downtown by many of the bars and restaurants. Some mistakes were made internally by the management and owner, and this all contributed to one of Phoenix’s best restaurants permanently closing its doors.
I arrived at 7:30 am and the owner had already been there for two hours. He and his wife were pragmatically moving everything of value into a moving truck and planned to head back home permanently. Very few words came to mind that morning. I wanted to say something inspirational to him and was usually good at doing things like that, in this case, however, nothing came to mind. I was feeling very emotional and that was not helping “the right words” to come through. I was one of the few remaining original staff. I had been part of this restaurant family three to five days and nights a week for a little over two years. I was not only losing some very helpful extra income, but also saying goodbye to some good friends and a home I had been very comfortably part of for some time. I have never been good with emotional scenes, so I simply hugged the owner, said goodbye, and got in my car to drive my four and a half hour trip to Las Vegas.
The moment I got safely into my car was when the tears began to flow. It was sad to witness a friend’s dream coming to an end. I was depressed about the end of working in a really fun place and saying goodbye to a good part time job. The restaurant was really struggling with making a profit and I knew that it would probably close. My card readings suggested it, and I could practically see that there was no way the owner could continue to operate in such conditions. He had been “robbing Peter to pay Paul,” and I’m sure he was exhausted. Not only was I saying goodbye to some good friends, but I was also experiencing another ending. It was probable that I would no longer work in this field again. There were many endings happening that morning and it was more than a little overwhelming. I cried more than a few times on my drive to Vegas.
I have been in and out of the restaurant business for almost thirty years. I started as a busboy in the Bethpage state park golf course in New York at the age of sixteen. Since that time, I have waited tables and tended bar in more than a dozen different places. One of the things I have always liked about the business is something most people actually don’t like. It is a fluctuating stream. Some shifts you make $8.00 and then the next one could be $300.00. The gambler in me always enjoyed the surprise. Working odd hours and not doing nine-to-five has helped me to stay away from the normal work stream. This had given me more time to pursue my creative interests. Best of all, the majority of people in the restaurant business are also creative, open-minded, eccentric, and interesting to say the least. This business seems to pull in a larger share of mature and old souls, my kind of people. Some of the friends I have met in the many different restaurants have become lifetime friends.
As I made my way north I had a flood of different memories. I remembered the close friends I worked with at two different restaurant chains when I still lived on Long Island. I met so many lovable characters and made frequent trips to the Huntington diner after our shifts. I was in my early twenties at that time, smoked a good amount of pot and did my share of drinking with some of my fellow restaurant friends. I made good money, had some real fun and occasionally pushed the limits with my “bad boy stuff.” I made a whole bunch of new friends when I moved to Arizona and began to work in a cheesy prime rib hotel restaurant. Nearly every night we hung out after our shifts and drank Bailey’s and coffee by the huge fire pit. Some of those friends became roommates and supported me during some really tough times. I remembered the French restaurant I worked at for seven years. Each night after our shift we had a family style dinner. I learned about great wine and cognacs and really got to develop a taste for gourmet food. I had been part of that family for a long time. My emotions were on overload as I got closer to Nevada. So many funny memories, interesting people, supportive friends, and positive experiences that spanned three decades. I have always been blessed with an abundance of friends and the places I worked had provided the majority of them. It was incredible when I thought about how many different friends and family work environments I had been a part of over the years. A few of the people remain close to me and I still fondly remember many of the ones I have lost contact with as well. I could see how each person I knew in all of the different places I had worked, had influenced who I now am, and I am sure I have done the same for many of them.
When I first realized that the Pasta Palace was going to close I began to panic a little. I would be losing nearly a third of my current income. Even though I had options for other part-time restaurant jobs, I felt no desire to pursue them now. It was time to go in a different direction. There were books to finish and new ones to start. It was time to put myself out into the world in a bigger way and expand the amount of clients I could help. I knew exactly what I needed to do and had the courage to do all the things that were necessary to replace the income I would be losing. Better still, I could do it in far less hours than the restaurant took to make the same amount of money. Financially I would be fine. The universe would take care of me. My fear about the future passed fairly quickly. Still, my emotional body needed to mourn the loss for a few days. My two years there were beneficial and special and I needed to celebrate my sadness. All things change, and this chapter had come to an end. There was a new chapter in my life beginning and I wasn’t exactly sure how it was going to go, but I knew it would be equally challenging and fun.
In Lakota Indian teachings, Tate is their word for the spirit of wind. Wind reminds us that sometimes we have to make minor or major changes in our lives. When we don’t listen to the gentle nudges of wind, it may have to get very loud and scream at us. Thankfully if we listen, Wind can direct us to flow to new places in gentle ways. Tornados and Hurricanes are examples of Wind at its most challenging. Nature can be very loud and even destructive at times, it can shake up larger areas and groups of people. When we listen to Tate we can trust the prompts and know that we will be carried to new and fertile ground. I opened my car window and felt the cold morning breeze. It was perfect for me to be mourning my loss as I drove to Las Vegas. This would be followed by checking in to my comped hotel room and experience some fun and luxury for a few days. I would have plenty of good distractions to keep me from thinking about my loss and worrying about tomorrow. That is what I love about Las Vegas, I get to be mindless. The fun would help to pull me away from the sadness. Deeper still, as sad as I was to say goodbye to this part of my life, some part of me wanted it to end. I was tired of all of the extra hours I had been putting in, and I think the owner was as well. I had co-created this ending and I have evolved enough to see that there was no victimization in any of it. I had chosen to more forward and manifest abundance in some new areas. I would joyfully say goodbye and at the same time, exist between that place where sadness at an ending and excitement for the future co-existed. I would enjoy some good rest and play for a few days and also look forward to the excitement of starting the “next chapter.”
Jim Ventura 1-2011
http://playingwithuranus.blogspot.com